Karmic Buddha

The Guys' Rules:
At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down. Finally, the guys'
side of the story. We always hear "the rules" from the female side, now here are the rules from the male side.

These are our rules!

Please note.. these are all numbered "1"
ON PURPOSE!

1. Men are NOT mind readers.

1. Learn to work the toilet seat.
You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down.
We need it up, you need it down.
You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.

1. Sunday sports. It's like the full moon or the changing of the tides.
Let it be.

1. Shopping is NOT a sport.
And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

1. Crying is blackmail.

1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

1. Come to us with a problem only If you want help solving it. That's what
we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a problem. See a doctor.

1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.
In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't Expect us to
act like soap opera guys.

1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways
makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

1. You can either ask us to do something or tell us how you want it done.
Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during
commercials.

1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We
have no idea what mauve is.

1. If it itches, it will Be scratched. We do that.

1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," We will act like nothing's
wrong. We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, Expect an answer you don't want to hear.

1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear Is
fine...Really.

1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, or golf.

1. You have enough clothes.

1. You have too many shoes.

1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

1. Thank you for reading this.
Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; but did you know men really don't mind that? It's like camping.

1889
September
5 September 1889
STRANGE STORY
In the Midst of Life Preparing for Death.
How a War Veteran of the Fourteenth Regiment Was Measured for a Coffin,
Selected It. Also, His Burial Place, and Died a Few Days Later.
James B. TOMSEY, a veteran of the Fourteenth Regiment, who died on Saturday
last at his late residence, 576 Gates avenue, aged about 44 years and 6
months, was a cheerful, thoughtful man, and friends and former comrades in
arms were present at his funeral, which took place on Monday, the Interment
being made at Cypress Hills.
Mr. TOMSEY had been twice married and was a widower with five children. He
was from 1878 to 1886 an employee of the Brooklyn Post Office, a portion of
the time connected with Brevoort Station. He was latterly a bank clerk.
While he was not a sick man in the common use of the words, his physician,
who attended him only during the last six days of his life, certified that
he died of Bright's disease and enlargement of the heart. It is now known
that a few days before he was taken seriously ill he visited Undertaker A.
LEWIS at 464 DeKalb avenue, and somewhat astonished that gentleman by
expressing a wish to be measured for a burial casket.
Mr. LEWIS noticed nothing unusual in his manner, no despondency nor lack of
cheerfulness. Mr. TOMSEY said that "The dead can take care of themselves,
but the living must be provided for." Mr. TOMSEY was not only measured, but
selected a rosewood casket, made satisfactory arrangements for paying for
it when wanted, and left the place. He went thence directly to Cypress Hills
Cemetery and pointed out the spot where he desired to be buried, between
the graves of his two wives in his family plot. He then returned home and
read to his housekeeper his will in which he had made such provisions as he
could for his children. All this occurred, as already stated, before he was
taken ill, and it would appear that he must have had some strange
premonition that his days were drawing rapidly to a close.

Well yesterday was a day that I'll never forget. It all started out so weird. I woke up early which in itself is a strange and rare occurance. Spoke to dennis, for a piece before he went to work. I hoped online and found that chico was home from work. So I asked for a ride. We decided to get together after work, because the girl he is courting has plans.

When I got to work, i find out that this was Chris Rung's last day! And that his father had a heart attack, (thank god hes okay). As the day progressed it got strange. My 'rents called me to tell me they had a wake to go to, and that they would leave me food. lol

Later Chris and I discussed all kinds of things, and how he is trying to improve his life. We dubbed February 15th The day of new beginnings. Well this is where the story becomes amazing. Around 2am while im finally fast asleep, my door swings open and standing in the door jam is Dennis, totally drunk grin ear to ear screaming.. I WON IT I WON IT ALL! It just so happens my little brother, won the grand prize... Basically a boat load of money! So yeah lets hope that the rest of 2006 is as great as this one day was...

Damn son, I don't know what has come over me lately, but its like Meloncoly times 3 million. Leading up to this week, I've been pretty good, no depression of any kind. Actually feeling like im on top of the world. But the past few days, have really taken its toll on me.

Its like reality set in once again and fucked my whole head up. I guess its because everything is going great for everyone around me. Which don't get me wrong, Im totally happy for everyone. Brother Chris with his Girl! Brother Dennis with his winnings, and hopefully soon my pa dukes with the promotion.

But such events and triumphs of the people around, have made me take a step back to look at my own situation. I have nothing, basically. I feel like a rope is tied around my neck and ever so slightly tightening around my esophogus.. Like what am I gonna do man? Yeah Ive been foolish, but fuck Im 24, im entitled to being a little dumb with money and just life. But I need to take a bigger role in my life i think.

In 6 years i'll be thirty? And what am I gonna ; nay where will i be then? Still living at home working part time, single and no asperations or dreams?! Fuckin Scary isn't it?! Well im done.. this is always a nice release for me!

I just love this picture of me! I look so bad ass and mean!